For Achievement in Transformer Watching…

transformers

Oooh that sounds good!

The Oscar nominations were announced today and as I scrolled through the list I have to admit this:

it took a LONG time before I got to one I’d seen.

Fortunately, I made it to “Achievement in sound editing” category, where I spotted the resounding critical success, Transformers listed. Phew. This was starting to get embarrassing.

Seems like since we moved back from London, I haven’t seen hardly any films at all. I don’t know why. Could be the distractions of a new house, or working a “real” job again, or the all-too-easy access to the movie theatre that lulls me into a false sense of forever-films. But week after week films have come and gone, and it seems I haven’t gotten the time to go.

Or maybe it’s something else.

I scanned the list of the nominees and realized something. Have a look with me. Here’s my OWN 2007 Oscar Nominations List, based on actual nominations. See if you can guess the film or talent that goes with each.

1. Best Animated Feature Featuring the Only Animal Left In the Animal Kingdom That Hasn’t been Disney-Pixarized yet, Swimming in your Food, Most Commonly known as a Sewer-Dwelling, Disease-Carrying Rodent

2. Best Performance in a Supporting Role by An Actress that Everyone thinks is Cate Blanchett, at First, But realizes it Isn’t and Has No Idea Who It Is When They Hear Her Name.

3. Best Performance by An Actor Wearing Ugly Glasses who, if He Were a Woman, Would Never Ever Get as Many Juicy Roles as He Does

4. Best Picture for a Film featuring Tommy Lee Jones as an Old Man, FINALLY!

5. Best Performance by the Actress who is Going to Make Pregnancy All the Rage at High Schools this Year.

6. Best Screenplay, Picture, Actor, For Another Excuse to Cutaway to George Clooney Every Other Shot During Oscars.

7. Best Picture for the “Daniel-Day Lewis Picked My Film To Star In!” Lottery Winner.

Well, that’s all I got for now, but sheesh, there are so many more. I feel a bit jaded, but maybe that’s just me, mourning the fact that, in the few hours I got to sit down and watch a flick this summer, Colin said “I hear this is really good!” and put in the DVD.

The hours with Megatron, I will never get back.

Elizabeth Howard

Elizabeth writes literary non-fiction, haiku, cultural rants, and Demand Poetry in order to forward the cause of beautiful writing. She calls London, Kansas City, and Iowa home. 

  4 comments for “For Achievement in Transformer Watching…

  1. Colin
    January 24, 2008 at 10:57 am

    You don’t want ’em back! You secretly loved Tranformers! C’mon … admit it.

  2. Tammy
    January 25, 2008 at 10:24 am

    Hey! I know – I just only recently saw Juno. What happened to those carefree days in KC when all we did on weekends was go to the movie theatre to check out the oscar nominees! Juno was great, by the way. Very interesting dialogue!

    And wait – when did you get a real job?

  3. Tammy
    January 25, 2008 at 10:33 am

    PS – did I mention RAGBRAI is stopping in Ames this year?

  4. Corwin Howlett
    January 30, 2008 at 7:47 am

    Funny oscar titles. I even know who most of them refer to.

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