I am making some updates to my blogrolls, here and on my home page. It’s tedious, but it’s been on my to do list for a long time. That’s because I really LOVE to read other friends and writers blogs and share their great ideas too.

However, since I’ve/we’ve started morphing to Facebook and readers and Twitter, I’ve gotten out of the habit of adding my friends on my blogroll here. I think I keep waiting for some kind of miracle of technology to tell me it has some kind of Google Search shortcut to find out all my favorite sites and dropping links to them on my blogroll.

Let’s face it: I am sure that widget exists, but I haven’t found it yet.

–

So anyway, as I was doing that today, I realized I’d broken my blog. If you are one of those people who reads it at the actual site you might have notice the formatting has changed. I had to dismantle it entirely because a plugin I installed started chomping away at its insides. Yes, that is the technical term.

–

Which is fine. I really want to update the theme here, but I haven’t been able to decide what I like yet. All of this has made me forget — ARGH! — what I meant to start by telling you which is that I stopped by Amy Oscar’s blog today. I’d been away from her for awhile, and the minute I returned I was in love again.

The design isn’t all that fancy. It’s just her VOICE I love to hear. She sounds so comfortable and regular. It’s very hard to achieve that in writing. You have to practice being yourself ALOT in everyday life. Another friend of mine — Alma Schenider, who has the great cooking blog “Take Back the Kitchen” — also has this sort of easy voice on her blog. Makes you feel very at home. When you meet Alma in real life, she very at home in her own skin too. I haven’t met Amy in real life, but I bet she’s cool like that too.

–

Which is just to say that I keep on forgetting to just chill out in my writing. The month of small stones, though, helped. (Thanks Fiona) And the poetry is helping too.

-

Oh, and in case you are curious what’s a favorite topic of conversation at the dinner table around here, I can tell you: it’s llamas.

All llamas, all the time.

You might also like:

1. 5 Great Things to Say in a Blog Comment (Here and Elsewhere)

This is a Guest Post by Matt Brotherton, part of the BIG QUESTION series: “What does America Want?“

–

I don’t know that I can speak for everyone out there. I’m not sure anyone can define what an entire nation of people really want. The differences between people can be like night and day. Everything I believe that is good for the country, for myself, my friends, and my family, might be in direct contradiction of what my next door neighbor thinks is best for us all. The question seems both simple and yet, more complex than anything I’ve ever thought about before.

My entire life, I’ve been told that I need to find what it is that makes me happy and pursue that. Watching my parents, what they’ve done to provide and care for all of us and more, has instilled in me something more, though. The day in and day out struggles of keeping a family safe, comfortable, fed and content seemed like what it was we’re all supposed to do. My parents worked hard to make sure that we had everything we needed, and even a few things we just wanted.

I don’t want to make the impression that there was no one out there more badly off than we were. I know that even in my own extended family that just isn’t true. Yet, still, it seemed like every time we took one step forward, we were taking one step back. I know that’s not entirely true either. I can look back on my life and see how far my parents actually climbed, through hard work and determination. How far we’ve all come because of it.

I think if there was any one thing that Americans want, it’s for that burden, that struggle, to be a little bit easier. I don’t think the majority of us are actually asking for a hand out. I think we just want some of that oppressive burden to be taken off of our shoulders. It’s been my experience that when one person’s burden gets a little smaller, a little lighter, they in turn will help the next person down the line. We aren’t asking for a hand out. Most of us aren’t looking to be given something for nothing. We’re willing to work ourselves to the bone to get ahead, to advance. All we need is the opportunity.

I’ve seen a lot of rhetoric about redistributing wealth or putting the debt on our kids. I can’t help but think about who those statements are targeting. They aren’t targeting the top 1% of the Nation. They are designed to make people like me, sitting comfortably in the middle-class be afraid that I will fall down into poverty.

They truth is, that if we don’t do something to create the opportunities to advance — if we don’t find a way to lift a little bit of that burden from the people below us — than we will fall. Without a solid foundation, no building can stand. I’m afraid all the weight at the top of the building that we call America is starting to show signs of strain in the basement. The least we can do is add a few support beams.

–

Matt Brotherton is a doodler, writer,  and part time philosopher. You can find more of his rants and dreams at http://www.mabrotherton.com or follow him on Twitter.

You might also like:

1. My List of Things I Want (For America)
2. What does America Want?
3. Big Question #1: What does America Want?

Today’s post is part of the BIG QUESTION series for September. 

–

I’ve been writing this blog for a long time. And I am not ready to admit what I am doing is not working. I want something from this relationship and it is just not working.

We all want to hang on to things that just don’t work for us. But as I’m been realizing slowly over the last year, especially while reading a lot of Tara Gentile:

I can’t see what I’m doing.

If my hypothesis is formulated, then my product doesn’t match it.

I am impatient. I see the end of the tunnel and think “I’ve arrived! AHHHHH! Now I can relax” and so let go of the steering wheel. While the winding road goes on and on.

My language is harsh, and I am too critical. Of others, which reflects on myself.

In this dark bag, how could I possibly see what all the non-subscribers and non-readers see:

What I offer here isn’t working for them. And I can’t afford to just be personal anymore.

I am not sure I have the answer to this. But I am sure I am tired of treading water.

My hypothesis, however, has not changed: Readers desire beautiful writing.

You might also like:

1. Dinner’s Ready!

Guest Post by Amanda Quraishi

tweet @ImtheQ

As an Official American Citizen, here’s what I want:

1.      I’d want to see the respect employed among opposing parties in our national political discourse.

2.      I want American Tax Dollars invested back into AMERICA so that We The People, and our children can benefit from a strong, modern infrastructure.

3.      I want to see more people volunteering in their local communities.

4.      I want to be able to give my children whatever resources they need to compete locally, nationally, and globally.

5.      I want to know that the people we elect to public office are listening to The People they represent.  Not just the highest bidders.

6.      I want to believe that We are still a Great Nation.

7.      I want to know that Hard Work still means something in America, and that there are still some places that being born into privilege can’t get you.

8.      I want to be The Destination for the best and brightest people around the world to come, live, and make a life here.

9.      I want to see a revival of small businesses, community-based farming, and home-based industries.

10.     I want to be a part of the process—social, political, and spiritual–of making America better than ever.

–

AMANDA QURAISHI is a writer, blogger, interfaith activist and technology professional living in Austin, Texas.  She currently works full time as the Web & Database Administrator for Mobile Loaves & Fishes, a non-profit organization that addresses the issue of homelessness in the U.S.

Amanda’s thoughts are part of the BIG QUESTION Series for September: “What does America Want?”

Do you have an answer to the BIG QUESTION?

You might also like:

1. What does America Want?
2. Big Question #1: What does America Want?
3. 50 Things That Make Me Feel Normal

Today on “House Hunters International,” a family of four from near-Toledo were seeking a vacation home in St. Croix. They were a nice family: he an ER doc. She a nurse (now SAHM of a 9 and 14 y.o). They needed an escape from their designer, 5400 sq ft. home in the most wealthy (ish) nation in the world.

What does America Want?

Less.

It doesn’t actually know this.

It doesn’t actually believe this when told.

But it is true. America wants less.

It Desires More. 

But that Desire for “something more” is a bottomless pit of dissatisfaction.

Less.

Less: work, stuff, noise.

(The family from Ohio wants that too. They have everything in the U.S. they could dream of, but now that they’ve fulfilled their desires, they still hear the siren call of less: to something quieter. Simpler. Where they can hear the waves, they can walk to the market, and where their sons can share a room. And with a few less throw pillows.)

Question: What would you like less of?

–
This post is From September’s BIG QUESTION series, asking: “What does America want?” Please feel free to answer at will, here, there and anywhere!

You might also like:

1. Untangle Me
2. The Year of Playdates: Extrapolation of Fun!

August retreats.
It hands us back the year.

Summer isn’t truth, but it is
(as Harris Telemacher recites)
“What we wish were true.”

So many of us
Shove out this
Season of perspiration, lazily
Forgetting how it
Slows us
Beguiles us
Presses us to hold still
Find the windy spaces
With a friend
In the lustre of the
Earth as it
Rots away
Happily. On comes the
Harvest and the rush of
Putting it all away.

Yet one more hour won’t you
Come and sit with me
In the shade before it
Cools. Time is
Hot berries
Unwilling
Yet ready to burst.

—

Hey, be sure to come back tomorrow for the beginning of the “Big Question” series, asking “What does America Want?” — a series of post, ponderings, guest podcasts, and thoughts on one Big Question, in the month of September. See you…

You might also like:

1. The South End and The North End
2. C’mon everybody… follow me to The Lost Summer!
3. A Summer Affair Review: Novel as Cop-Out

Here’s what keeps happening… I keep getting self-conscious and don’t want to say anything so I stay quiet.

Then something like a week passes and I think: what happened to that time? Oh my goodness, if I am just quiet, if I don’t say anything, what meaning does it all have?!

How can I remember the beautiful moments, the hilarious things said (“Mom, look. I have bird poop on my finger! How did it get there?“) if I am so quiet?

I am looking up, very busy, and I don’t have time to stop and scribble, to note the sound of the cicadas in the maple on this cool, breezy Saturday.

I don’t have time to remind myself how much I love living at the break in the esplanade, because it means hearing the cars slow, pause, wheels resist the ground, and break apart the rubber, sighing as they U-turn.

I am slicing this watermelon and chunking it and putting its body in a plastic box for later. I don’t have time to note the feel of the knife resisting the thick rind, wondering how the rind was imagined first, and the artist’s eye who made the flesh bright red.

Those trees have something to say to me, but I am very very busy sweeping white sand from Dubai off my screen porch!

How can I leave a week go by and bear to do all this laundry?

You might also like:

1. It’s No Secret…
2. On the Meaning of Chex Mix…
3. 50 Things That Make Me Feel Normal

Bloggers love to read their comments. And blog commenting is a key part of the give-and take life we live out here.

But sometimes reading posts leaves us unsure of how respond: we don’t quite know the best way to tell the blogger we stopped by.  Let’s face it… we are all lazy sometimes and don’t bother.

I understand that totally. I’m guilty too of the “Read and Leave.” But I have found that commenting on posts allows me to think more closely about the writing. It helps see how and why I spend time writing my own blog in the first place. And I recommend it.

So, I’ve assembled the Top Five Ways to Respond to Blog Posts…keeping in mind that just about ANY response (other than defamation of character) is welcome on blogs. Blogs should be open places of conversation and discussion.

That being said, I’ll start with number one, the most controversial:

1. “I Disagree.”  Many/most bloggers are opinionated bastards who reside in fanciful, flowery, one-sided universes. And they need a good shaking! SO, if you don’t agree with their rant or have another viewpoint to share, please DO say so. Of course, it’s always a good idea to support your side of the argument with some kind of evidence or logic.
2. The Quote. Speaking of evidence, why not include your favorite part of the post in your response? Cut and paste it and tell the blogger why you liked catchy phrase or idea you liked. Similarly, you can follow up with ….
3. The Question. This can simply be “What the hell do you mean by______?” Sometimes, it can be “How did you come up with this idea?” or fun existential questions like:
   • Why do you think this is true?
   • Who inspired you to believe this?
   • Do you think you would feel this way if you hadn’t drunk two double lattes prior to writing this post?
4. The Story. You see a bit of yourself and your story in the post, and you want to tell the writer a little bit about yourself. So you start your comment: “This reminds me of when I ….”  or “I can totally relate to this because I…”  For me, these comments I write sometimes become blog posts of their own, which I link back to the original, inspiration post.
5. The Resource Link. Something in the post reminds you of another great post you’ve read elsewhere, and you just have to share it with the blogger.  You tell the writer and share a link, maybe to your own blog, or to somewhere else.

You might also like:

1. One Great Blog
2. This Blog is TOO HOT, This Blog is Too COLD
3. “Why I’m Too Scared to Blog”

You ever get a bit of time where you feel like you are just dry out of ideas? I never seem to be out of ideas, but it seems like lately I keep hitting a wall of no.

The wall of no has quite a few people sitting on top of it, their hairy legs dangling down. They sit up there and look down at me and whenever I feel like hauling myself up and over, they eyeball me and say:

“Nope.”

My life has all kinds of odd characters in it at the moment: social workers, supervisors, assistant professors, attorneys, life coaches, tree trimmers and the like. So you just never quite know who it will be that day, sitting up there, when I look up.

The oddest person I see up there — and the most common, of course — is myself.

Usually dressed up in a big hat.

You might also like:

1. Dancing with Time
2. Time, Sculpted and Consumed
3. Dry Milk

What can you get done in 10 Minutes?

Right now, my kids are brushing teeth and puttering about in the last few minutes before school, I am stealing away (aside really… they are right behind me!) to post here.

So many times we say “I don’t have time!” Yet what happens when we make a to do list, or set our minds to something? It’s amazing how much we can get done in a short period.

Last evening, while Colin finished fixing the kitchen sink faucet and repairing some woodwork, I completed the following:

• washed dishes
• Put kids to bed
• cleaned and swept the kitchen
• folded laundry
• wiped the counters and the tables
• sorted recycling
• wrote a short list for today
• started MORE laundry (motherhood!)
• sent Colin out to empty the kiddie pool (delegating is OK!)
• organized the calendar for the week
• paid bills
• emailed a friend I missed and hadn’t seen in a while

I did all of that work in an hour. Yes, it’s just “everyday” work, but our ability to get things done every day — even in monotony — shows us what we are capable of in our work life.

Imagine if the thing driving you wasn’t just beating back the filth of the house, but was your life’s passion?

(Of course, that’s after beating back those fears!)

What do you think? What do you get done in 10 minutes?

You might also like:

1. Me vs. the Minutes
2. 90 Minutes from Door to Balloon