The Lawn Mower Heard Round the World

My husband is mowing the lawn right now…

Shhhh. Can you hear that?

No that isn’t (just) the sound of our gas-guzzling 42″ Ariens Super-Deluxe Tractor Mower/Cheese Slicer.

That’s the thundering palpitation of his heart.

Damn, some things a woman just CANNOT get in the way of, no matter how environmental-y she is. A man and the big tool he desires –shiny orange and growly — is definitely one of them.

So we had this grungy old lump of a lawn machine that was moping in our shed for three years. My husband was embarrased every time he sat on it and I don’t blame him.

That mower was an emphysemic old man who refused to give up his Camels. Colin rode Blue Smokey around the yard dejectedly.

Instead of getting a new wife, my husband was kind enough to just upgrade on his lawn machine. When it got delivered to our driveway, however, it didn’t WORK!

I tried to help. I tried to be supportive but nothing I did was working!

WHY? I now know. Because nothing in our relationship, our house, or our lives was ever going to work again until that mower worked.

Thank god my husband is persistent, sweet and handy with other tools. He bravely dove into the shiny new heart of the beast and fearlessly tinkered with its veins Until the Blades Turned.

The force is strong in this one.

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